Friday, July 6, 2012

5 Types of Guys Every Girl Meets at a Nightclub

Women go to nightclubs for different reasons.  Some go to dance, others go to meet guys, and some just want to get wasted and have a good time.  No matter what the reason is, however, women are always going to run into the same types of guys.  Below I will describe which are the five most frequented ones you will run into and how to deal with them.

1. The Drunk 

The Drunk is probably the most common guy you will come across in a nightclub.  This guy can be found at any time and in any location.  Don’t think just because he is drunk he will be found at the bar.  They are wanderers that have no real home.  He will mix it up with whoever will talk to him or show him attention. Try not to make eye contact with this guy because once involved in a conversation he will be hard to get rid of.  And whatever you do don't stand too close.  The drunk spits when he talks so be warned.  

Best Advice – If he begins to talk to you alert a bouncer.  Once confronted by a sober bouncer they will make sure he takes his party to the streets.  If you try to fend him off yourself try not to be rude.  Once angered the drunk will become highly obnoxious and will try his best to make sure no one has a good time.

 2. The Stalker

The Stalker, also known as the Creep, is the guy that makes you look over your shoulder when you walk to your car at the end of the night.  This is the guy you catch staring at you from across the club.  He looks angry and tries to do his best James Dean, but it comes off more like he's constipated instead.  This guy has issues.  He usually does not trust women, and will sometimes hate them.  Unfortunately, nature still gives him an attraction to you.  He will see other guys talking to you and mutter under his breath how much of a whore you are.  Don’t try to talk to this guy or approach him.  It will only make things worse when he freezes up or stumbles over his words.  This is not the nice guy you read about in Cosmo.  He is one rejection away from turning into a sociopath.

Best Advice - Ignore him and don’t let him see you talking about him to anyone, and especially your girlfriends.  The last thing you want to do is give the stalker hope.  Ladies, you need to really protect yourself here. Make sure you do not walk to your car alone. Remember there is safety in numbers with this lunatic.

3. The Dancer

The Dancer is oddest guy on this list.  He wants to show all the girls, and guys for that matter, his moves.  Hours upon hours of dancing in front of the mirror has finally paid off.   Too bad it comes at the expense of an enormous amount of body odor.  This guy’s shirt is so wet he looks like he just got out of the pool.  Careful not to get to close or he might try getting his sweat and grease all over you.  The good news is he might be just as happy dancing by himself.  You will notice him making consistent bathroom breaks to “dry off”. 

Best Advice – He can be hours of entertainment for you and your friends.  Enjoy watching from a distant,  but whatever you do don’t get into a dance battle with him. Even if you think you can win he is best avoided.  He will not take losing gracefully, and he will not let it go.  This guy can easily become the stalker if motivated to do so.

4. The Baller

The Baller can usually be found in the VIP section of the club wearing sunglasses.   He will be with a bunch of his fake friends buying bottles for them and having the bouncers bring them girls.  He might seem to have game, but it’s just a cover for his extreme insecurities.  He will throw his money around in the douchiest way too.  Have you talked to him yet? If you did, I’m sure you already know what kind of car he drives, and how nice the view from his condo is.   What he won’t tell you is how his parents would be upset if they found out he’s spending his inheritance on bottles rather than an education.

Best Advice - For you ladies he is a goldmine of free drinks.  Just don’t stray too far or he will find other girls to quickly fill your place.  Going home with him might seem tempting, but no one wants to see a grown man cry after sex. 

5. The Grabber

The Grabber, also known as the groper, can be found hanging out by the dance floor or blocking the walking lanes to the ladies’ room.  In his lesser form he will grab a girl by the arm and pull her towards him.  He thinks it is suave and that girls like a take charge guy, but little does he know it’s assault.  On the dance floor he is just a pure pervert.  He will grab, rub, and pinch anything that moves.  Be careful with this guy, he's one grope away from being a straight up rapist.

Best Advice – Throwing a drink in his face will be your first instinct, but that will only anger him and you enable the possibility that he might get off on it.  If you don’t have a drink you will no doubt slap him across the face.  However, this technique will only work if there are witnesses, and once again you are in danger of turning him on further.  The best thing you can do is walk away and alert a bouncer.  If he doesn’t let you go, scream for help.  This guy has date rape written all over him, be sure he doesn't catch you on the dance floor alone. 

In conclusion, all you women out there should now be aware of the types of guys you run into at nightclubs.   Hopefully, you have learned how to avoid these losers and fend them off.  Remember that the best safety for women against these types of guys will always be to travel in packs.  This way you can watch each others backs and alert one another when one is spotted.  Just whatever you do, make sure you don't get involved with the disasters that these guys have become.

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